Miscellany and Trivia

Anecdotes about Architects – One

MTr 2

A contractor, an engineer, and an architect were standing inside their recently completed building, looking out at the street. A VERY attractive woman walks by. The contractor whistles, the engineer says, “Did you see the legs on that woman?” The architect says, “Did I miss something, I was admiring my reflection”

Anecdotes about Architects – Two

MTr 3

An architect is said to be a man who knows a very little about a great deal and keeps knowing less and less about more and more until he knows practically nothing about everything, whereas, on the other hand, an engineer is a man who knows a great deal about very little and who goes along knowing more and more about less and less until finally he knows practically everything about nothing. A contractor starts out knowing practically everything about everything, but ends up by knowing nothing about anything, due to his association with architects and engineers.

Anecdotes about Architects – Three

MTr 4

How many architects does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Nobody knows for sure, it has never been witnessed.

Anecdotes about Architects – Four

MTr 5

A demolition engineer is someone who designs ways to destroy building architecture.

A demolition architect is someone who builds ways to destroy design engineering.

Anecdotes about Architects – Five

MTr 6

A contractor was hollering at an Engineer and an Architect - He said, “If you guys would just get these CAD drawings right the first time, you would be driving a Rolls Royce.”

Engineer Responds: “What’s a Roll's Royce?”

Architect Responds: “What's a CAD drawing?” *

*CAD (computer-aided design) software is used by architects, engineers, drafters, artists, and others to create precision drawings or technical illustrations. CAD software can be used to create two-dimensional (2-D) drawings or three-dimensional (3-D) models.

Anecdotes about Lawyers – One

MTr 2

A reasonable fee

 A man phones a lawyer and asks, “How much would you charge for just answering three simple questions?”

The lawyer replies, “A thousand dollars.”       

“A thousand dollars!” exclaims the man. “That’s very expensive, isn't it?”

It certainly is,” says the lawyer. “Now, what's your third question?”

 

Anecdotes about Lawyers – Two

MTr 3

Problem at the zoo

Someone mistakenly left the cages open in the Reptile House at the zoo and there were snakes slithering all over the place.

Frantically, the keeper tried everything, but he couldn't get the slippery animals back into their cages. Finally, he yelled, “Quick, call a lawyer!”

“A lawyer? Why”       

We need someone who speaks their language.”

Anecdotes about Lawyers – Three

MTr 4

Lawyer and Engineer

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean when they got to talking. The lawyer mentioned, “I'm here because my house burned down and everything got destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything.”

That's quite a coincidence,” remarked the engineer. “I'm here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood. My insurance company, too, paid for everything.”

There was a brief pause, and hen the puzzled lawyer asked, “How do you start a flood?”

 

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